Green Eggs and HAM (Slightly Revised)

I do not like green eggs and HAM.
I do not like them SAM I no longer am…with.

I do not like them in your OFFICE.  
I do not like them in your HOTEL room.  
I do not like them in his CAR.
I do not like them near or far.

I do not like green eggs and HAM.
I do not like them SAM I no longer am…with. 

I do not like them when you text.  
I do not like them when you two have s@x.
I do not like them when you flirt (with him).  
I do not like them in your tight A-line skirt.

I do not like green eggs and HAM.
I do not like them SAM I no longer am…with.

I do not like them on his “nutjob” day
I do not like them in your “three-way”
I do not like them with your fake life sham
I do not like them with your master plan 

I do not like green eggs and HAM.
I do not like them SAM I no longer am…with.

I do not like them with your lies
I do not like them when you bat your eyes
I do not like them in a gourd
I do not like them in mommies umbellical cord.

I do not like your HAM at all
I do not like how you destroyed it all 

I hope you like green eggs and HAM
Cuz I despise them SAM I no longer am…with. 

Author Unknown (by you)